So it seemed that it was cool, for everyone to be in a relationship but me.
So i took matters into my own hands. and ended up with him. HIM who displayed the characteristics of a cheater. A liar. An abuser. And a thief.
So why was I surprised when he broke into my heart? I called 911, but i was cardiac arrested for aiding and a bettin’ cause it was me who let. Him. In.
Claimin’ we were “just friends” it was already decided for me by the first date that even if he wasn’t I was gonna make him. THE ONE.
You know, I was tired of being alone and I, simply made up in my mind that it was about that time. So i decided to drag him along for the ride. Cause i was always the bridesmaid. AND NEVER THE BRIDE.
AH. Virgin in the physical, but mentally just a grown woman on the corner. And he was tired of the wait. So i was gonna make him the ONE.
He had a form of godliness. but not much.
But hey, hey i can CHANGE him. So i’ll take him. I mean… he’s close… enough.
Ready to sell my aorta for a quarter. Not knowing the value of what use to be. Arteries so clogged with MY WILL it blocked HIS WILL from flowing through me.
So i thank
CHRIST.
That his blood pressured this heart. ATTACKED. that flatlined my obscured vision. Put me flat on my back.
Through my ignorance, he SAWED through my sternum. He SAWED and cracked open my chest to transplant Psalms 51:10. A new HEART. And a renewed, right spirit within. So now i FULLY understand. BETTER YET, i thoroughly comprehend how much i NEED. TO. WAIT…
… for YOU.
See… the bad thing is that i KNEW he wasn’t you from the beginning. Cause in the BEGINNING was the WORD. And he didn’t even sound or SHINE like your SON.
Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. And all he could whisper were sweet. empty. NOTHINGS.
Which meant NOTHING.
He couldn’t even pray when i needed him to. Asking him to fast would be absurd. So forget about being cleansed and washed with water through the word.
But i know you. You are already praying for me. Even having never met me, let me assure you. I. WILL. WAIT. FOR. YOU.
I will no longer date, socialize, or communicate with carbon copies of you to appease my BOREDOM or to quench my thirsty desire for attention and short-lived compliments from sorta-kindas.
You know he SORTA-KINDA right, but SORTA-KINDA WRONG. His first name LUKE. His last name WRONG.
iiiiiii…. WON’T settle for false companionship. I won’t lay in the embrace of his arms. attempting to find some closeness, but never feeling so. far. apart. cause… i just wanna be held.
Cause all i gotta do is say…. NO.
No more almost sessions. of almost coming close. Passing winks. And buying drinks. And i’ma i’ma i’ma FLIRT.
… who FLIRTS with the ideology of “can you just tell me how much i can get away with and still be saved?”
NO MORE.
I’ll stay in my bed. ALONE. And write poems. About how I WILL. WAIT. FOR. YOU.
He won’t even come close. Our fingers won’t even interlock. We won’t even exchange breath, cause i have thoughts that i’ve saved as a file God has only equipped YOU to open.
I will no longer get weighted down from so-called friends and family talks about the CONCERN FOR MY BIOLOGICAL CLOCK… WHEN I SERVE the AUTHOR OF TIME. Who is not subject TO time, but i am subject TO HIM.
He has the ability to stop. Fast forward. Pause. Or rewind. At ANY GIVEN TIME. So if we could role play, you would be Abraham and i would be Sarah.
Or you could be Isaac and I could be Rebecca. A servants answer to prayer. I am BONE of your bone. Flesh of your flesh. Made up of your rib, ADAM!
And once we meet, like ELECTRONS, I will be bound to your nucleus. Completely indivisible, ATOM.
We will even speak the same MATH.
1+1+1= 3, which really equals 1 if you ADD ‘EM.
We were ALL created in HIS image, but you have the ability to reflect, project and even detect… THE SON.
If i were to explain what you looked like you would have to look like a STAR. A son of the sun. I would gain energy simply from the LIGHT that you shine on me. I would need you in order to complete my PHOTOSYNTHESIS.
I await your REVELATION. But once again, from the GENESIS.
I. WILL. WAIT. FOR. YOU.
And i will know you.
Because when you speak, I will be reminded of Solomon’s wisdom. Your ability to lead will remind me of Moses. Your faith will remind me of Abraham. Your confidence in God’s word will remind me of Daniel. Your inspiration will remind me of Paul. Your heart of God will remind me of David. Your attention to detail will remind me of Noah. Your integrity will remind me of Joseph. And your ability to abandon your own will, WILL remind me of the Disciples. But your ability to love selflessly and unconditionally will remind me of
CHRIST.
But i won’t need to identify you by any special math you use or any special marks. Cause HIS word will be tatted all over YOUR HEART.
And you will know ME. And you will find me where the boldness of Esther meets the warm, closeness of Ruth. Where the hospitality of Lydia is aligned with the submission of Mary. Which is engulfed in the tears of a praying Hannah.
I will be THE ONE. Drenched in Proverbs 31. Waiting for you…
But to my Father. My Father who has known me before i was birthed into this Earth.
Only if you should see fit… I desire your will ABOVE mine. So even if you call me to a life of singleness. My heart will be CONTENT. With you, the ONE WHO WAS SENT.
YOU. Are the greatest love story ever TOLD.
The greatest love EVER KNOWN.
You are forever my judge and i am forever your WITNESS.
And i pray that i’m always found on a mission about my father’s BUSINESS. I will always be YOURS. And i will always wait. for. you. LORD.
More than the watchmen wait for the morning. MORE THAN the WATCHMEN wait for the morning.
I. WILL. WAIT.
(SO WHAT. if i got bored. and watched a video which included beat poetry and Jesus. So what if i wrote the whole thing down. i love this. and it was worth my time).
